Thursday, May 13, 2010

Going Wireless: It's TIME!

Women of the (modern) world, unite.  Obviously nothing on the home front is going to change until we make a big stink about it, like women's suffrage or something.  For years now I've patiently waited, often suggested to techno-types, that it's time we had a cordless vacuum.

I'm not talking about a wimpy Dirt Devil kind of machine.  I'm talking turbo-powered John Deere style cleaning power that we wisk through the house either riding or pushing effortlessly without the annoying ten pound cord.

Yes, cord.  Oreck may proudly proclaim their eight pound wonder, but wait.  I have this little lightweight.  It's fine unless you TURN IT ON.  Then it ratchets up about twenty pounds and is tethered to a ten pound cord.  Okay, I haven't weighed the thing, I'm just saying it FEELS that heavy.  I have estimated that to clean one room, I spend five minutes cleaning the floor and fifteen minutes manipulating the *x&^$#@&$### cord!

Are you hearing us, engineers?  Do you care about the fairer sex, inventors?  Can we seriously talk about this?  I see women having smiles on their faces when Father Knows Best comes home from a hard day at work, dinner simmering, floors shining, children playing Scrabble on the cleanly vacuumed carpet that they pleaded with Mom to be next to clean with the Turbo-Vac.  Okay, I'm a dreamer.  But think, Mr. I-Can-Put-Batteries-On-Anything.  A real cordless vacuum will get you Man of the Year, a bronze bust in the lobby of every hotel, and any real woman you want.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Blog Archive